I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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