now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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