Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize