In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Sorry about my life...
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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