YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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