Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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