They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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