the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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