Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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