Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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