i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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