she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize