we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize