my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
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