Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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