She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
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It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
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Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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