what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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