Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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