It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
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You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
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You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
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