3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize