I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize