a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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