I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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