I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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