Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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