The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize