I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize