he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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