and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize