Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
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