i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Randomize