so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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