Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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