I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
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