I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize