Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize