you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I will be naked everywhere
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
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