I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
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