White coat. Heels.
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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