i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
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He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
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I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
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