dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
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