Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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