are you still at the devil's house?
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Randomize