You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize