Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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