It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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