I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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