She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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