Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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