it's too hot outside to masturbate.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
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